Cherishing Christ

It's a known fact that marriage is difficult. It's also a known fact that you really have no idea how sinful you are until you get married. But one thing that I was unaware of before I got married was how hard it is to be a Christian and be married. Not that the two are incompatible, they're not, but that I have had to start relearning how to be a Christian as a wife, because it's different than being a Christian as a single woman.

My life has completely changed from how it was a year ago. My schedule is different. The things that I spend my time on are different. And my priorities are completely different. Through all this change in my life I have lost an affection for Christ. Not because I wanted to, but more because I've been distracted and my heart hasn't been set on him. I've really only been going to church because that's what I'm supposed to do. I read my Bible because I'm supposed to. And I've just gotten way to caught up in other things, and my heart has started to grow indifferent.

And frankly, it's started to scare me.

So I am in the process now of learning how to cherish Christ again. I am attempting to fill my life with Christ centered things like listening to teachings and reading Christ centered books. Prayer is starting to ignite my heart again, especially when it's with other believers. And I am starting to feel a burden for the lost that I haven't felt in a while.

But I don't want to just try and be a better Christian. I don't want to muster up my faith in order that I might do they right things. I want my heart to truly cherish Christ. I don't want Christ for his stuff, I want Christ for Christ.

I have been reading a book called The Prodigal God by Tim Keller. It's a great book, I highly recommend it. In the book he talks about the parable of the Prodigal Son, which he says should really be called the parable of the Two Lost Sons, because it's just as much about the older brother as it is about the younger brother. And he says that both brothers were really only interested in what the Father could give them instead of just wanted the Father himself.

Once I'm in a place where I don't cherish Christ above all else, I am in a place of sin and disunity from Him. And I don't want to be there. So if you think about it, you can pray for me. Pray that Christ would stir my affections for him and him alone.